ケツメイシ – おじさんの取説 歌詞 ( Lyrics)

曲名:おじさんの取説
歌手:

配信/発売日:2024/01/31
作詞:ケツメイシ
作曲:ケツメイシ

おじさんはもっとイジられたいの
仏頂面してて 良いワケ無いの
話す人 家には居ないから
声かけて欲しいの 意外かな?
パワハラ気にして誘えませんから
「たまには飲んだり遊びません?」って
仕事上がりには 声掛けて
ただ人が恋しいの それだけです

悩み 相談が大好物
仕事の愚痴には 大興奮
酔えば話が 不明瞭
どうせ覚えてないから無礼講
挨拶 大きく 元気良く
行く時は朝まで 景気良く
とにかくでかい声で「ごちそうさま!」
言えば喜ぶ 勿論タダ!

おじさんの おじさんによる
おじさんの為の取説です
猛批判も 動じないの
だって死ぬまで僅かもう時間も

おじさんの おじさんによる
おじさんの為の取説です
おじさんを どうしたいの?
きっと20年後にもう居ないよ

言われる前に言う「おじさんです」て
あの下ネタもノリなんです(なんちゃって)
くしゃみデカい 声もデカい
死にそうに咳き込みます すぐ屁コキます
話長いけど聴いてくれ
流行りのアレで“いいね”くれ
若者と距離縮めたいのに
新しい言葉でいじめないで

言いたかないけど昔はね
なんか暗いんだね あ!?うざいんだね
世間の顔色気にしてます
身に滲みます 最近胃にきてます
ラーメン食べて高楊枝
丸いお腹でまた大盛り
“イケオジ”“かわいい”を欲しがりで
懲りないね それがおじさんです

おじさんの おじさんによる
おじさんの為の取説です
猛批判も 動じないの
だって死ぬまで僅かもう時間も

おじさんの おじさんによる
おじさんの為の取説です
おじさんを どうしたいの?
きっと20年後にもう居ないよ

キャバ嬢の営業LINEも
ちゃんと丁寧に返信し
未読無視、既読無視、
それでもめげない心意気
相談されると嬉しくて
ついつい長めに書き足して
冗談交えて励ましたのに
返信来なくて落ち込んで

部下にカラオケ褒められて
若い人の曲手を出して
高音出なくて恥かいて
次の日声出ずガラガラで
のど飴くちゃくちゃ舐め出して
知らない女性に睨まれて
思わずたじろぎ会釈して
その夜はやっぱり呑み過ぎて

おじさんの おじさんによる
おじさんの為の取説です
猛批判も 動じないの
だって死ぬまで僅かもう時間も

おじさんの おじさんによる
おじさんの為の取説です
おじさんを どうしたいの?
きっと20年後にもう居ないよ

オヤジギャグは 言葉遊び
切れ味鈍さ 昭和なごり
下ネタは挨拶 悪気無い
令和とのギャップを炙り出し

セクハラにさせない「なんちゃって!」
最後 ボケたフリ「何だって?」
いつまで出来るの 若さ売り?
しているおじさん 馬鹿なフリ

ozisan ha motto izi rare tai no
buttyouzura si te te   yo i wake na i no
hana su hito   ie ni ha i nai kara
koe kake te ho sii no   igai kana ?
pawahara ki ni si te saso e mase n kara
「 tama ni ha no n dari aso bi mase n ? 」 tte
sigoto a gari ni ha   koeka ke te
tada zin ga koi sii no   soredake desu

naya mi   soudan ga dai koubutu
sigoto no guti ni ha   daikouhun
yo e ba hanasi ga   humeiryou
douse obo e te nai kara bureikou
aisatu   oo kiku   genki yo ku
i ku toki ha asa made   keiki yo ku
tonikaku dekai koe de 「 gotisousama ! 」
i e ba yoroko bu   motiron tada !

ozisan no   ozisan ni yoru
ozisan no tame no torisetu desu
takesi hihan mo   dou zi nai no
datte si nu made wazu ka mou zikan mo

ozisan no   ozisan ni yoru
ozisan no tame no torisetu desu
ozisan wo   dou si tai no ?
kitto 20 nen go ni mou i nai yo

i wa reru mae ni i u 「 ozisan desu 」 te
ano simo neta mo nori na n desu ( nantyatte )
kusyami dekai   koe mo dekai
si ni sou ni se ki ko mi masu   sugu he koki masu
hanasi naga i kedo ki i te kure
haya ri no are de “ ii ne ” kure
wakamono to kyori tizi me tai no ni
atara sii kotoba de izime nai de

i i taka nai kedo mukasi hane
nanka kura i n da ne   a ! ? uzai n da ne
seken no kao iroke ni si te masu
mi ni si mi masu   saikin i ni ki te masu
ra-men ta be te takayouzi
maru i o naka de mata oomo ri
“ ikeozi ” “ kawaii ” wo ho si gari de
ko ri nai ne   sore ga ozisan desu

ozisan no   ozisan ni yoru
ozisan no tame no torisetu desu
takesi hihan mo   dou zi nai no
datte si nu made wazu ka mou zikan mo

ozisan no   ozisan ni yoru
ozisan no tame no torisetu desu
ozisan wo   dou si tai no ?
kitto 20 nen go ni mou i nai yo

kyaba zyou no eigyou LINE mo
tyanto teinei ni hensin si
midoku musi 、 kidoku musi 、
sore demo mege nai kokoroiki
soudan sa reru to ure siku te
tuitui naga me ni ka ki ta si te
zyoudan mazi e te hage masi ta noni
hensin ko naku te o ti ko n de

buka ni karaoke ho me rare te
waka i hito no kyoku te wo da si te
kouon de naku te hazi kai te
tugi no hi koe de zu garagara de
nodo ame kutyakutya na me da si te
si ra nai zyosei ni nira ma re te
omo wazu tazirogi esyaku si te
sono yoru ha yappari no mi su gi te

ozisan no   ozisan ni yoru
ozisan no tame no torisetu desu
takesi hihan mo   dou zi nai no
datte si nu made wazu ka mou zikan mo

ozisan no   ozisan ni yoru
ozisan no tame no torisetu desu
ozisan wo   dou si tai no ?
kitto 20 nen go ni mou i nai yo

oyazi gyagu ha   kotoba aso bi
ki re azi namakura sa   syouwa nagori
simo neta ha aisatu   warugi na i
norikazu to no gyappu wo abu ri da si

sekuhara ni sa se nai 「 nantyatte ! 」
saigo   boke ta huri 「 nan datte ? 」
itu made deki ru no   waka sa u ri ?
si te iru ozisan   baka na huri

Uncle wants to be bullied more.
Is it okay to keep a straight face?
The speaker is not at home.
Is it an accident to want you to talk?
I won't invite you because I care about the harassment of authority.
"Do you drink occasionally and don't play?"
Say hello after work
I just miss people

I like to talk about my troubles most
Very excited about complaining about work
If you're drunk, you don't understand
Anyway, I don't remember, so I'm rude.
Say hello and cheer up.
When I went there, it was prosperous until morning.
In short, he said in a loud voice, "Thank you for your hospitality!"
Of course I'm happy to say it!

According to uncle's uncle
This is for my uncle's words.
Will fierce criticism not waver?
Because there is only a little time to die.

According to uncle's uncle
This is for my uncle's words.
What do you want with your uncle?
It will definitely not exist in 20 years.

Say "uncle" before being said by others.
That joke sucks, too (say what)
The sound of sneezing is also very loud
I'm dying. When I cough, I fart right away.
It's a long story. Listen to me.
"Like" me with popular clothes.
Obviously want to shorten the distance with young people.
Don't bully me with new words

I hate to say it, but I used to.
It always feels dark! ? It's really annoying
The face of the world is very good.
Infiltrated into the body, and recently came to the stomach.
Have some Lamian Noodles.
The round belly is big again.
Want to be "uncle" and "cute"
It's really hard, that's uncle.

According to uncle's uncle
This is for my uncle's words.
Will fierce criticism not waver?
Because there is only a little time to die.

According to uncle's uncle
This is for my uncle's words.
What do you want with your uncle?
It will definitely not exist in 20 years.

So is the hostess's business LINE.
Write back seriously
Ignore unread, ignore read,
Even so, I am not discouraged.
I would be happy to be consulted.
Unconsciously write very long.
It is obviously a joke to encourage.
I was lost because I didn't reply.

Praise karaoke by subordinates
Hold out the young man's hand.
I'm sorry I can't pronounce high notes.
Don't make any noise the next day, somehow.
Lick out the sugar in your throat
Be targeted by unknown women
I nodded trembling.
I really drank too much that night

According to uncle's uncle
This is for my uncle's words.
Will fierce criticism not waver?
Because there is only a little time to die.

According to uncle's uncle
This is for my uncle's words.
What do you want with your uncle?
It will definitely not exist in 20 years.

Uncle funny is a word game.
Sharp and dull showy wind
Dirty jokes have no malice in greeting.
Find out the gap with the order

Don't let sexual harassment "what!"
Finally, play dumb. "What?"
When can you do it, sell young people?
Do uncle play dumb.

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