曲名:カメレオンの憂鬱
歌手:

発売日:2022/08/03
作詞:草野華余子
作曲:草野華余子

固く閉ざした瞼の奥に誰にも知られぬ闇がある
右向け右を汚さぬように倣って身体を差し出した

人と違うと唾をかけられて
はみ出すなと杭を打ち込まれて
紛れ方党えたカメレオン

板についてきた迷彩万全で守る体裁
違和感に気付いても口に出すのは大罪
上手く馴染めたでしょうか上手く笑えたでしょうか
いつの日かありのままで救われることを信じて

鈍色に憂う瞳孔に映り込む世界は極彩で
真実(ほんとう)の色など霧の中

強く握った拳の中に誰にも譲れぬ夢がある
その為ならば何も厭わない誓いが呪いに変わろうと

必要とされる幻想居場所があるだけ上等
あの頃は良かったと思うことすら大罪
上手く馴染めたら正解上手く笑えたら正解
少しずつ着実に触まれて澱むグラデーション

いっしか心まで染められて
それでも足りないと塗り重ねて
自分の色忘れたカメレオン

どんなに繕ったってどんなに着飾ったって
埋まらない満たせない泣くことすらも出来ない
誰か本当の私を色を失くした私を
もう一度抱き締めて全て赦してくれないか

鈍色に歪むこの世界に佇む私は一体誰
救いなんて何処にも無かった
死んだように生きる憂鬱なカメレオン

kata ku to zasi ta mabuta no oku ni dare ni mo si ra re nu yami ga aru
migi mu ke migi wo yogo sa nu you ni nara xtu te sintai wo sa si da si ta

zin to tiga u to tuba wo kake rare te
hami da su na to kui wo u ti ko ma re te
magi re kata tou e ta kamereon

ita ni tui te ki ta meisai banzen de mamo ru teisai
iwakan ni kizu i te mo kuti ni da su no ha taizai
uma ku nazi me ta desyo u ka uma ku wara e ta desyo u ka
itu no hi ka arinomama de suku wa reru koto wo sin zi te

nibiiro ni ure u doukou ni utu ri ko mu sekai ha kyoku irodori de
sinzitu ( hontou ) no iro nado kiri no naka

tuyo ku nigi xtu ta kobusi no naka ni dare ni mo yuzu re nu yume ga aru
sono tame nara ba nani mo ito wa nai tika i ga noro i ni ka waro u to

hituyou to sa reru gensou ibasyo ga aru dake zyoutou
ano koro ha yo kaxtu ta to omo u koto sura taizai
uma ku nazi me tara seikai uma ku wara e tara seikai
suko sizutu tyakuzitu ni sawari ma re te yodo mu gurade-syon

ixtu sika kokoro made so me rare te
sore demo ta rinai to nu ri kasa ne te
zibun no iro wasu re ta kamereon

donna ni tukuro xtu ta tte donna ni kikaza xtu ta tte
u mara nai mi ta se nai na ku koto sura mo deki nai
dare ka hontou no watasi wo iro wo na kusi ta watasi wo
mou itido da ki si me te sube te yuru si te kure nai ka

nibiiro ni yuga mu kono sekai ni tatazu mu watasi ha ittai dare
suku i nante doko ni mo na kaxtu ta
si n da you ni i kiru yuuutu na kamereon

Behind the tightly closed eyelids, there is a darkness that no one knows.
I turned to the right and offered my body in imitation so as not to defile it

I was spat on for being different
I was staked to stay out of the way
a chameleon who has learned how to blend in

the camouflage that has become the norm, the appearance of protection
it's a mortal sin to speak up when you feel uncomfortable
did I fit in well did I laugh well
Believing that one day I will be saved just as I am

The world reflected in the dull, melancholy pupils of my eyes is a world of extreme colors
The color of truth is in the mist

In my tightly clenched fist, I have a dream that no one can give up
For that, I'll do anything, even if my vow turns into a curse

the illusion of being needed, just to have a place to stay, that's all that matters
It is a mortal sin to even think that those days were good
It's right if I fit in well, it's right if I laugh well
Little by little, steadily touched by the gradient of stagnation

At first even our hearts are dyed
And if that's not enough, you paint over it again and again
A chameleon who has forgotten his own color

No matter how much I mend it, no matter how much I dress it up
I can't fill it up, I can't fill it up, I can't even cry
Will someone hold me again, the real me, the me who has lost my color
Will you hold me again and forgive me for everything?

Who am I that I am standing in this world distorted into a dull color
There was no salvation anywhere
A melancholy chameleon living as if dead